Fear of Failure, or Success?

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure." - Marianne Williamson

We are all afraid of failing at some point in our lives. Whether it is the fear of letting our loved ones down, or failing at getting a cake to rise, it comes up a lot. But what about the fear of success? Recently I was speaking with a friend about my personal fears around failure, and how it holds me back, sometimes, from trying. Now, don't get me wrong. I've done a lot, succeeded at a lot, and I am no shrinking violet. But once in a while, something is so important to me, a dream so big, that I am afraid that if I don't live up to the dream, it will be ruined forever.

My friend advised me that I am probably more afraid of success than failure. To which I heartily disagreed. Success would be lovely. But it did get me thinking - is success just as terrifying as failure? Do we really want to succeed, with all that success entails? Maybe meeting your dream partner means that you will lose your freedom and have to settle down. Maybe becoming a published author means that your thoughts and dreams will be open to criticism by others.

When have you ever been afraid of success?

Demand Studios Cuts Thousands of Articles

"You can't cross the sea merely by standing and staring at the water." - Rabindranath Tagore

Freelancers and business owners all know the risk of relying too long and too heavily on one big clients, and writers around the world -- myself included -- are now feeling the heat for this poor business strategy.

Demand Studios, for whom I do a great deal of writing work, has recently began restructuring their business so that they have fewer articles published to their clients (content sites like eHow and Livestrong) and the assignments that remain are better quality. While low-quality articles that clog up the net are definitely a problem, this restructuring has come on suddenly, unexpectedly (at least to me and hundreds of others), and has left many, many writers almost completely out of work. There are not enough assignments to go around for the first time in years, and the list of available articles to write has dropped by +20,000.

As writers, we are told not to fear. We are told,this is a temporary restructuring. That the articles available to us will be higher quality, easier to write, and increasingly frequent. We are told this is all normal and will improve working at Demand Studios overall. And then, we as writers sit and stare at our screens, and wait, and wait, and wait. 

Now, if we had taken ourselves, our businesses, and our livelihoods more seriously, we would not have put all our eggs in one baskets, as this timely article that arrived in my inbox the other day describes: Make More Baskets by Rob Garrett. 

For the moment, I am more or less surviving. In fact, I am taking this as an opportunity to broaden my horizons, find new clients, challenge myself in new areas and take my writing business more seriously. But thinking of all the people that relied on this giant company for their income till now, I feel deeply concerned --  and wonder why hardly any forewarning was given to the freelancers who make their company possible? 

Time will tell how this pans out for all of us involved. Talking to people, reading inspiring quotes, and in general staying positive is an important regimen for me during this transition, and I remind myself that not all changes are bad ones. 

The New Zealand Earthquake

My apologies for the delays in updating and posting on this blog of recent, as my home in New Zealand has recently been hit with a series of devastating earthquakes.

Today is my first day back in my home and office, as well as my first day with running water and sewage. There is little damage to my home, but many are not so lucky. Some people have lost plates and dishes, others have lost everything. Aftershocks can still be heard, like bombs dropping in the distance. 

There is cleaning and rebuilding to do, and all the while life must go on, and I must continue to send out work in order to pay for the bills and the mortage. 

I have just posted the following on the e-zine, Wildberries, which I am editor for:

--
Hello and my apologies for the delays in releasing the second issue of Wildberries.

With the continuing earthquakes we have been experiencing here in New Zealand, in addition to family illness, this issue is very late indeed. With the most recent 6.3 earthquake on Friday, 22nd of February, there will unfortunately be even more delays. 

This national tragedy has claimed jobs, homes and lives of people close to me. My own job is now lost, as the health shop where I worked was brought down to rubble along with countless other buildings and businesses. It will take time and energy to rebuild, and even more time and energy to heal. 

Let me finish my saying that while these are dark times for New Zealand, my home, it is also a time when creativity, inspiration and hope are needed most. While Wildberries and other projects will take longer then originally planned, they will still go ahead, and like life, they will move on. 

My love to everyone out there, and my thanks for your support and understanding. I will be posting more regular updates on progress at my blog The Rabbit Hill. 

Joel Le Blanc

Editor 

P.S. If anyone can spare funds for a donation to the Christchurch Earthquake Appeal, please go to: http://www.redcross.org.nz/cms_display.php.  Thousands of families are still without clean water, electricity, sewage and shelter. Every little bit helps.

--

Once I have been able to catch up on more of the workload that is piling up around me, I will hopefully be able to catch up on personal projects, especially those concerning Wildberries and this blog as well. 

Thank you to everyone for your support and encouragement through this difficult period. 

All the best,

Joel Le Blanc